Last week, I attended my high school class reunion – 64 years after graduation. We didn’t bother with reunions for a long time. Perhaps we were too busy carving out careers for ourselves. Or rearing children. Or paying off mortgages. 

               We had our first reunion – if I remember correctly – in 2012, a multi-class reunion with several grades above and below us. We enjoyed that occasion enough that we have had a class reunion every two years since. 

               I’ve noticed something about the nature of our conversations. 

               The first couple of times, we talked about the old days. Things we did, when we were kids. We found old photos. We dredged our memories for tales to bring to the surface. 

               In the words of an old and unprintable limerick, we talked about “who did what, and to whom.”

               This time, though, the talk wasn’t as much about the distant past, but about current concerns. About our health, of course – our bodies have all passed their best-before dates. Some members have died. Others are no longer capable of travel.

               And about how our lives are changing. About downsizing into smaller housing that requires less care. Into apartments or condominiums. About getting rid of a lifetime of accumulation that our children and grandchildren don’t need, don’t want, and won’t know what to do with anyway.

               But we talked about our current enthusiasms, too. What are we doing these days? And why? What benefit do we derive from doing it? Where have we travelled? What made the trips worthwhile? What are we looking forward to?

Looking ahead

               The reunions made me realize that friendships, like gardens, need maintaining. 

               Once upon a time, when we were young and green, friendships grew like weeds (to continue the garden metaphor). We didn’t think about them; they just happened. Literally, we grew together. 

               Then time passed. Friends became acquaintances, then became memories. Treasured memories, perhaps, but still memories. They had no current relevance.

               We had our own lives to lead, after all. Especially if we had moved away, to Toronto, or Houston, or Indonesia. 

               And sometimes we grow distant in other ways. Events change our attitudes. A death, a divorce, a financial crisis, forces us to reconsider concepts that we used to take for granted. 

               We start to see the world differently. 

               Now when we get together, we have to realize that others may not have changed the same way. Sometimes, they’ve gone in opposite directions. Discussions of politics, of religion, can become, umm, well, touchy. 

               Every two years is not very often to maintain friendships. But it feels, now, as if some of those deeper discussions are possible again. We don’t have to agree on everything to talk about it. 

               The process reminds me, again, that friends are more than close acquaintances. Just because you see people every day at work – or at school – doesn’t make them friends. Friendships, to my mind, have several requirements. 

               Shared interests – at least three in common.

               Shared histories – or at least a desire to build a history together, a commitment to help this relationship flower. 

               And a willingness to trust each other, even when differences surface. 

               Given those qualities, friendships can be more than short-term associations. 

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Copyright © 2017 by Jim Taylor. Non-profit use in congregations and study groups, and links from other blogs, welcomed; all other rights reserved.

                       To comment on this column, write jimt@quixotic.ca

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YOUR TURN

Most of the responses to last week’s column, about the power of volcanoes, focussed on my closing thoughts about “Acts of God.” 

               Laurna Tallman put the issue bluntly: “If you do not attribute all of nature to the concept of ‘God’ you have pulled out most of the foundations of rational thought about God. God IS nature and we are a part of nature and it is in that sense that God dwells in us.”

               Laurna then wrote a second, much longer letter (from which I use only these excerpts): “I am not talking about ‘pulling strings.’ The assumption that God causesnatural disasters is simply a way of saying that nature is part of the notion of ‘God.’ If you think that ‘God’ waitsto move rocks until someone will be punished by the rockfall, you are distorting the notion of nature and natural causes, which we learn from science. You legitimately object to that primitive notion of God, but you have thrown out the baby with the bath water. One of the great revelations of the Old Testament is that God/nature/human nature has a provision for unexpected events in nature: foresight and foreknowledge. 

               “For example, the west coast of North America is overdue for a tectonic plate shift that will decimate the cities on the coast. Why anyone would stay there, I cannot imagine. Yet, articles by geology experts have not prompted a mass exodus from Vancouver, Seattle, and Portland. In ancient times, that type of knowledge of geology -- e.g., when a volcano was going to erupt -- was rare. Today, such events are more predictable. The unrest in the Ring of Fire that is highly visible in Hawaii's Big Island is but one of many alerts that tectonic plates are under tension.

               “Long ago, and now, some people had an inexplicable feeling they should move. Lot, for example, when the local volcano was about to blow. Moses, when he led the children of Israel out of Egypt. Joseph, when he took Mary and Jesus to Egypt to escape the predictable wrath of another kind of natural disaster -- Herod. 

               “You can just as easily say that the moving of the earth's crust is a glorious and powerful example of God's power as to read the geological event as a sign of God's malevolence. The ones who do not try to establish that kind of connection with ‘God’ will perish, not through God's ‘punishment’ but because they are not paying attention. Perhaps they are incapable of doing so. 

               “We ascribe what we still don't understand to ‘God’ and take credit for our discoveries of former mysteries under the rubric of ‘science,’ as if those categories were necessarily oppositional, which is absurd. All that is known and unknown might still be ascribed to ‘God’ as a unifying principle for what has been and remains a mysterious guiding force among humans.”

Karen Bueno picked up the same theme: “Since God is that power in whom we live and move and have our being, and the power that created all that is in our universe (and presumably any other universes, if there are such), then don't volcanoes and hurricanes and tornadoes and tsunamis and earthquakes (which are certainly not controlled by humans), don't those events arise from the power of creation that is the power of God? Are not ‘natural forces’ a part of that power that is the ground of our being?

               “Maybe your issue is with the word ‘Acts’, as if that power we call God intentionally and with divine purpose causes these events.  ‘Nature’ and its forces have been created by the power of God. So have cancer cells and other diseases that we can treat but not yet control.

               “The power of God is not the power of the puppeteer, who will change natural forces (which God created) when it might help God's people, whom God loves.”

Lee d’Anjou asked, “I don't know what dictionary you're using, but mine defines an ‘act of God’ as ‘an event that is beyond human control, such as earthquakes , flood, and storms.’ Notice there's no specification or implication of cause. Natural forces or luck could be causal.”

Steve Roney: “If you believe in God, then saying a volcanic eruption is not an act of God but the predictable result of predictable forces is like saying a house was not build by a contractor, but by saws and hammers. Besides being an odd way of looking at things, it also seems, on the face of it, incredible. Who, if it was not God, laid down those natural laws, then? If he was omniscient, how did he not see exactly what they would do? How could he not intend it?

               Necessarily, for a conventional theist, anything that is not an act of man is an act of God.

               “Chance does not work as an alternative explanation for either scientists or theists. In scientific terms, to use the term is an admission of defeat; it just means you cannot figure out what caused it. If, on the other hand, you believe in an omnipotent God, then there is no room for chance either. As Einstein put it, ‘God does not throw dice’.”

Ted Spenser offered more insights into the effect of pressure: “Increasing pressure [both] raises the boiling point and, for most ‘stuff’, lowers the freezing/melting point. The lowered melting point is what makes skates slippery. Squeezing the ice with the very thin skate edge turns ice into a film of water, which is slippery. [Similarly] Grandma’s pressure cooker cooks beets in a hurry because the water in there is above the normal boiling point of 100°C. The liquid water is happy in the pressure cooker at 120°C -- but don’t open the lid to check it!”

               “All that might be an act of God, but it might more likely be plain old physics.”

Doug Linzey looked at a different context: “As you state, Jim, what we commonly call ‘Acts of God’ may not be acts of God at all. But they are still very common in contract law. What the term means is that if a natural phenomenon causes a glitch in a process, someone will not get paid. Ever since I first encountered it (in a smelter contract – shipping the product of a mining operation for refining), I've wondered if there can't be another term that doesn't involve intervention of a mysterious higher power.”

Bob Rollwagen reflected, “In history, God was held responsible for anything that could not be rationalized. Learned people were careful to not to embarrass the church when they discovered something that put church doctrine in question. Unfortunately, in the 21st century, a significant percentage of the population appears to have not moved very far from this ancient understanding.” 

               Bob connected volcanoes with politics: “Erupting volcanoes are dangerous to be near. I am not that they are as deadly or disruptive as conservative right-wing leaders who work to limit government concerns about the future welfare of society by reducing financial support, for the benefit of the entitled. They create a toxic climate of half-truths that lead to voter decisions based on emotion instead of concern for the future.”

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PSALM PARAPHRASES

In biblical times, worshipers prostrated themselves on the ground before the Holy of Holies while reciting Psalm 138. For us, it feels like a strange position from which to express gratitude. 

1             This is your turf, your home, your territory.  I am so glad to be here, God, that I kiss the earth you dwell in.

2             I press myself into your soil, I inhale the sweet moistness of humus, I extend my arms to embrace your earth. 

But you lift me up from my humble position. You take me in as your guest. 

You have made me one of your family;  you have even given me your name!

3             You have taken me under your wing. 

When I cry out, you cover me;  I benefit from your strength. 

4             Foxes may lord it over the chicken coop,  and squirrels over the sparrow's nest,

but no creatures challenge the eagle's rule;

They cower before the eagle's eye and ruthless claws.

5             As the eagle soars above field mice,  so do you, God, surpass us mortals. 

6             Daily duties keep us scurrying close to the earth. 

But you keep watch over us;  you can see danger long before it draws near. 

7             Troubles grow around us like tall grass

but in the shelter of your outspread wings, predators scatter 

like leaves before an autumn wind.

8             There is a place for me in your plans.  You will never abandon me. 

You will work out your purpose for me, no matter how long it takes.

For paraphrases of mostof the psalms used by the Revised Common Lectionary, you can order my book Everyday Psalmsfrom Wood Lake Publishing, info@woodlake.com.

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TECHNICAL STUFF

If you want to comment on something, send a message directly to me, jimt@quixotic.ca.

                       To subscribe or unsubscribe, send an e-mail message to jimt@quixotic.ca. Or you can subscribe electronically by sending a blank e-mail (no message or subject line) to softedges-subscribe@lists.quixotic.ca. Similarly, you can un-subscribe at softedges-unsubscribe@lists.quixotic.ca.

                       I write a second column each Sunday called Sharp Edges, which tends to be somewhat more cutting about social and justice issues. To sign up for Sharp Edges, write to me directly, jimt@quixotic.ca, or send a note to sharpedges-subscribe@lists.quixotic.ca

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PROMOTION STUFF

To use the links in this section, you’ll have to insert the necessary symbols.

                       Ralph Milton ’s latest project is called “Sing Hallelujah” -- the world’s first video hymnal. It consists of 100 popular hymns, both new and old, on five DVDs that can be played using a standard DVD player and TV screen, for use in congregations who lack skilled musicians to play piano or organ. More details at wwwDOTsinghallelujahDOTca

                       Ralph’s HymnSight webpage is still up, http://wwwDOThymnsightDOTca, with a vast gallery of photos you can use to enhance the appearance of the visual images you project for liturgical use (prayers, responses, hymn verses, etc.)

                       Wayne Irwin's “Churchweb Canada,”an inexpensive service for any congregation wanting to develop a web presence, with free consultation. <http://wwwDOTchurchwebcanadaDOTca>

                       I recommend Isabel Gibson’s thoughtful and well-written blog, wwwDOTtraditionaliconoclastDOTcom

                       Alva Wood’s satiric stories about incompetent bureaucrats and prejudiced attitudes in a small town -- not particularly religious, but fun; alvawoodATgmailDOTcom to get onto her mailing list.

                       Tom Watson writes a weekly blog called “The View from Grandpa Tom’s Balcony”-- ruminations on various subjects, and feedback from Tom’sreaders. Write him at tomwatsoATgmailDOTcom or twatsonATsentexDOTnet