You probably had drilled into you, at school, a number of rules about writing:
· Never split an infinitive.
· Never start a paragraph with “I”.
· Never end a sentence with a preposition.
· Never start a sentence with “And” or “But”.
And you’ve spent most of your adult life trying to conform to those Never-Never rules, even when doing so required a mental hernia.
Those rules never were rules. Every one of the great English writers, the ones who set a model for us, broke those rules.
We got English from umpteen sources. Bits of the original Celtic still survive, overlaid by successive invasions from the Friesian lowlands along the North Sea, various Scandinavian Vikings invasions, and the Norman French. Meanwhile, the church used Latin. So did academics. Later, the British Empire scooped up random words from Arabic, Spanish, Hindi, and Chinese. Even, eventually, from American colloquialisms.
English is, in other words, a bubbling stew, a fermenting broth.
But along the way, well-meaning prescriptivists tried to turn it into steak-and-kidney pie. Or, perhaps a better metaphor, into pasta.
Because the language of the intelligentsia was Latin, they imposed Latin rules on English.
Hence the injunction against splitting an infinitive. In Latin, an infinitive is a single word. You can’t split it. In English, an infinitive is two words. Of course you can split it. Indeed, for clarity, you may have to.
Ditto for the rule about prepositions. Latin requires prepositions to connect directly to the case endings of nouns.
So, decreed the pedants, you must not separate an English preposition from its noun by putting it at the end of a sentence.
To which Winston Churchill once snorted, “This is the sort of bloody nonsense up with which I will not put."
Besides, how would you recast a child’s bedtime protest: “What did you bring that story I didn’t want to be read to out of up for?”
Nevertheless, I regularly hear, “But I was always taught….” Usually, it’s a Never-Never rule.
Those Never-Never rules teach us that it’s much harder to un-learn something than to learn it in the first place.
And so we cling to things “we were always taught” even when they no longer make sense.
Once, cars had clutch pedals. Safety decreed that the left foot was used for the clutch, the right for the brake. Today, most cars have automatic transmissions. The driver’s left foot does nothing. Using it for braking would shorten reaction times, and eliminate the risk of stomping on the accelerator accidentally. But some road-test examiners will still fail you if you use your left foot on the brake pedal.
Many people still insist that wealth trickles down, when experience demonstrates that wealth actually trickles up. The wealthy profit from the poor, not the other way around.
Perhaps nothing is so pervasive as what we were once taught about God in Sunday school. When asked to imagine in a God who doesn’t meddle in natural events, who doesn’t deliver red wagons and zap tumours, the inevitable response comes, “But I was always taught…”
It’s good to be open to new understandings. It’s harder to get rid of what we were once taught.
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Copyright © 2017 by Jim Taylor. Non-profit use in congregations and study groups, and links from other blogs, welcomed; all other rights reserved.
To comment on this column, write jimt@quixotic.ca
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YOUR TURN
Okay, you enjoyed last week’s excursion into folk sayings, maxims, adages.
So Margaret Mills wrote, “I enjoyed reading the maxims your mother said. I grew up with identical ones, so reading them brought back fond memories of my mother. Isn't it amazing how our culture shapes us! Although we have never met, we both grew up with identical maxims.”
And Mary Elford wrote, “I think you had fun with today's column! You made me chuckle several times.” She added, “Not either/or, but both/and, indeed.”
Peter Scott also endorsed that both/and theme: “I grew up with the same set of maxims and I'm convinced that these catchy little sayings, because they are so easy to remember, have a much greater impact on how we live our lives than the convoluted writings of the great philosophers and theologians.
“I agree that the pairs of maxims which appear to be contradictory are really just pointing us to the deeper truth that there are always at least two points of view worth considering on any question, and that balance is the key to a healthy life. My favourite maxim is ‘Too much of a good thing is a bad thing’. Isn't that easier to remember than ‘all profound truth is paradoxical’?”
Judith Killoh even had a maxim for Peter’s thought about balance: “...and my dear old Mum would say ‘Everything in moderation’. Wise words.”
Tom Watson had a different twist: “Most of us have likely heard the maxim, ‘A person is known by the company he/she keeps.’ A friend had a saying that gave that maxim a half twist: ‘Lie down with dogs, you get up with fleas.’ It does seem, though, that people just can't resist lying down with dogs; the only ones who end up happy about it are the fleas! In that vein,” Tom concluded grimly, “January 20 will soon be upon us.”
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PSALM PARAPHRASES
Vanderbilt Divinity School says this is the third Sunday after The Epiphany. That means the selected psalm is 27:1, 4-9. Except that I’m only giving you verses 4-6. If you don’t like it, complain to the Customer Service Department.
4 I have only one desire, one goal in life:
I want to be part of your family.
I want to look along the Thanksgiving table
and to feel the bonds of kinship--
with my cousins, my ancestors, my descendants.
5 Within that family I can feel safe.
I can hide my face in my mother's skirts;
I can rest my head on my son's shoulder.
6 Within that family, I need no longer fear what anyone thinks of me;
I can sing and dance;
I can be the joyful child that you created.
For paraphrases of most of the psalms used by the Revised Common Lectionary, you can order my book Everyday Psalms from Wood Lake Publishing, info@woodlake.com.
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YOU SCRATCH MY BACK…
• Ralph Milton has a new project, called Sing Hallelujah -- the world’s first video hymnal. It consists of 100 popular hymns, both new and old, on five DVDs that can be played using a standard DVD player and TV screen, for use in congregations who lack skilled musicians to play piano or organ. More details at www.singhallelujah.ca
• Isabel Gibson's thoughtful and well-written blog, www.traditionaliconoclast.com
• Wayne Irwin's "Churchweb Canada," an inexpensive service for any congregation wanting to develop a web presence, with free consultation. <http://www.churchwebcanada.ca>
• Alva Wood's satiric stories about incompetent bureaucrats and prejudiced attitudes in a small town are not particularly religious, but they are fun; write alvawood@gmail.com to get onto her mailing list.
• Tom Watson writes a weekly blog called “The View from Grandpa Tom’s Balcony” -- ruminations on various subjects, and feedback from Tom’s readers. Write him at twatson@sentex.net
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TECHNICAL STUFF
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My webpage is up and running again -- thanks to Wayne Irwin and ChurchWeb Canada. You can now access current columns and about five years of archives at http://quixotic.ca
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